Changing My Prayers

I enjoy reading Kelly's Korner Blog and she recently posted about changing her prayers for her children.  I loved what she had to say in this post and thought I'd share it on my blog as well.

I want so much for life to be "perfect" and for everything to always be so wonderful and great for these sweet faces...

but that really is not practical and deep down I know that.  We live in a fallen world and we are sinful people and life just cannot and will not be perfect. 

These adorable children of mine

will struggle and face hard days.  And God will use it to grow them. 

They will each have to learn to trust God in their own individual lives. 

As much as I want to protect them from the harshness of this world, I also don't want to stand in the way of God making them more like Him.

I want these precious little people to live a life dependent on God, and being dependent on Him ususally doesn't come from every circumstance being easy or pain free. 

 

  I do not want to shelter my kids so much that they think living a life of comfort and safety is the way to go.  I want them to be bold for Christ.  I want them to be brave and stand up for Him and live the life He's called them to!

Devos

September 11, 2012 When It Feels Better To Blame Someone Else By Lysa TerKeurst

"Pride only breeds quarrels, but wisdom is found in those who take advice." Proverbs 13:10 (NIV 1984)

You want to know one of the hardest three-word statements to make? "I am wrong."

It's so easy to point out wrong in others. It's so easy to want it to be someone else's fault. It's so easy to get critical and cynical and caught up in our limited perspectives.

But boy is it hard to see our own flaws. Where we went wrong. What we need to own.

I've been challenging myself on this. I recently had to correct one of my children for trying to blame someone else for something my child needed to own themselves. I could clearly see the pride, the insecurity, and the fear all wrapped around her blaming words. And why could I see it so clearly?

Because I see it in myself.

Bummer huh?

I had to have a conversation where I explained to my child something I'm learning myself. About blaming. And the dangerous path blaming can take us on.

In most conflicts I have two ways I can choose to travel:

The Path of Pride: I can blame the other person, focus only on their flaws, and refuse to own my part of it. That response will increase my pride and decrease the Lord's blessing in my life.

The Humble Way: I can honestly assess what I'm contributing to this conflict, admit where I went wrong, and ask for forgiveness. That response will lead to humility and increase the Lord's blessing in my life.

I see this principle woven throughout the Bible:

James 4:6, "That is why Scripture says: God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble." (NIV 1984)

Proverbs 29:23, "A man's pride brings him low, but a man of lowly spirit gains honor." (NIV 1984)

Matthew 23:12, "For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted." (NIV 1984)

I know this. I believe this. So, why do I still find it hard to implement sometimes?

Well, here's where my head wants to go when I start examining certain conflicts: "But what if it really isn't my fault? It's not fair to assign the blame with me when this person did this and this and this."

But that's the wrong direction to go. Don't try to assign the blame. Just own the part you brought into the conflict. When I approach a conflict with a heart of humility, I've yet to see where I haven't added something to the issue.

And if the other person doesn't own their issues—the Lord will deal with them. (See the verses above.)

There are gifts hidden in the tough stuff of conflict. There is grace and honor to be gained. But I'll only see those gifts if I stop blaming others and start examining myself.

Dear Lord, I want to follow Your teaching in this. But it's so hard. I'm mad and frustrated and hurt. The last thing I feel like doing is examining where I am wrong. But I know that's what I need to do. Will You soften my heart? Will You give me eyes to see beyond my hurt? Will You help me cut through the assumptions and wrong-thinking? I want to honor You in this, I really do. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
What do you do when you need to draw boundaries in certain tough relationships? If you feel you need to make some tough decisions in one of your relationships, click here to read Lysa's blog today.

Join the Proverbs 31 Ministries' Unglued Online Bible Study! This Unglued study, hosted by Melissa Taylor and Lysa TerKeurst, starts Sunday, September 23rd. You won't have to leave your house, change out of your pajamas, or even put on makeup. Click here to find out more and sign up!

To get your copy of Unglued, click here. To get your Unglued Bible study workbook and DVD, click here.

When you purchase resources through Proverbs 31 Ministries, you touch eternity because your purchase supports the many areas of hope-giving ministry we provide at no cost. We wish we could, but we simply can't compete with prices offered by huge online warehouses. Therefore, we are extremely grateful for each and every purchase you make with us. Thank you!

Reflect and Respond:
Think of a recent conflict with someone. Which way did you travel?

Remember, it's never too late to go back and go the humble way.

Now think of a conflict with someone that is happening right now. How can you travel the humble way?

Power Verses:
Psalm 25:9, "He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way." (NIV 1984)

Proverbs 11:2, "When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom." (NIV 1984)

© 2012 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Move Over Mean Girl

August 30, 2012 Move Over Mean Girl By Lysa TerKeurst

**The below is an email devotion I recevied from Proverbs 31 Ministries on Thursday, August 30th.  It's written by Lysa TerKeurst.  I just loved it and had to share.**

"Then Jesus said to his disciples, 'Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.'" Matthew 16:24 (NIV)

Last year, we logged over twenty hours in the car during the joy-filled excursion called family vacation. It was family bonding at its finest. Here's a little glimpse of the sweet conversations heard coming from the backseat.

Ashley: "Mom, Brooke just licked my hash brown! Ewwwwww!"

Me: "Brooke, why would you lick your sister's hash brown, for heaven's sake?"

Brooke: "Because my arm hurts."

Me: "Oh. Well, that just makes complete sense."

And that's just one little exchange. There may have been 127 other instances when the soundtrack of my car-traveling life was, "Mom ... she poked me, and she is on my side, and she just spilled her drink, and she took my iPod."

And, on occasion, I may have wanted to jump in the backseat and remove every shred of candy from my little tweenager's hands and dump it out the window. But I really didn't want my mean girl or my mean mommy to come out on the family vacation.

Have you been there? Honestly, the last thing that pops into my mind in those frustrating moments is: What does Jesus say about this?

I wish it did. So I'm trying to think about this now, in a non-heated moment. That way I can be better prepared for the next time my mean girl tendencies surface.

According to our key verse today, Jesus says we must do three things. But these aren't three easy steps. They are three shifts of the heart: we have to deny ourselves, take up our cross, and follow Him (Matthew 16:24).

Deny myself ... I have to deny myself the momentary satisfaction of the quick comeback, the rude response, and the full-out yelling. Over-sugared children can elicit craziness in a mama. Not that I have any personal experience with such things. No, not at all. And if you believe that, I've got some Easter candy off on the side of the road somewhere I could sell you.

Deny myself. It's hard. But it is the way with Jesus.

Then I must take up my cross ... My cross. Stop the blaming and finger-pointing and wishing everyone else would change and see my sinful reaction as a contribution to the problem at hand. I must take my issues to His cross and see my sin for what it is—sin. And I must be disgusted enough by my sin to truly want to do something about it.

Take up my cross. It's hard. But it is the way with Jesus.

Finally, I must follow Him ... Really follow Him. Follow who He is and how He is. I must close my mouth, pause long enough to let Him interrupt my eruption, and let His Spirit redirect me.

Yes, my children need to be corrected, but I can let the consequences scream so I don't have to. Only a calm mama can think of rational, reasonable consequences that instruct.

Follow who He is and how He is. It's hard. But it is the way with Jesus.

It's amazing how quickly my mean girl vanishes when I deny myself, admit my sin, and choose to let Jesus interrupt me.

Just don't be licking my hash brown if your arm starts hurting, okay? I have to draw the line somewhere.

Dear Lord, I don't want my mean girl to come out when I'm angered or aggravated. Give me the self-control to deny myself, stop blaming others, and choose to follow You. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
In Lysa's new book, Unglued, she shares personal and scriptural wisdom to help us respond with no regrets even in those moments when we want to explode, bitterly stuff our emotions, or react somewhere in between. Click here to order your copy today!

Are you ready to start learning to make wise choices in the midst of raw emotions but don't want to start it alone? On August 30th (TONIGHT) we'll be hosting a FREE Unglued Webcast at 8pm EST. Simply click on www.LysaTerKeurst.com to hear a powerful message. Sign up to get an email reminder about this FREE webcast and how to watch the replay if you miss it tonight by clicking here.

Join the Proverbs 31 Ministries' Unglued Online Bible Study! This Unglued study, hosted by Melissa Taylor and Lysa TerKeurst, starts Sunday, September 23rd. You won't have to leave your house, change out of your pajamas, or even put on makeup. Click here to find out more and sign up!

Reflect and Respond:
Have you lost your cool this week?

Take a minute to write out the situation and your response. Ask God to help you with this. Only He can change your heart.

Power Verses:
2 Corinthians 5:17, "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!" (NIV)

Galatians 5:16-17, "So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want." (NIV)

© 2012 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.